That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize
