Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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