Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
it's great music for shaving your balls
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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