my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
