She is in my trunk
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
