drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just cut my nipple shaving
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
