Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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