i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
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Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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