No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
accomplished twins. life is a go
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Randomize