This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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