Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
