You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
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It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
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Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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