if i can run in heels then i can drive
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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