please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we still banned from the library?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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