At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
