Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Your dad touched me again.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
