do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
