shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
