fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
