new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
