Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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