these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
