Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
