It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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