Small penises have feelings too.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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