So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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