i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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