We won't sleep together?
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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