It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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