Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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