After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize