Someone shit on the floor
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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