He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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