My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day