Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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