but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
