why didn't you poke me back
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
