I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
