I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Randomize
