and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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