i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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