I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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