just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize