if i can run in heels then i can drive
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
