New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
