Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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