i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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