worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
well you can't waste a boner
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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