yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
