Do you still have your period?
ugly people sure do ruin things
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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