so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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