The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize